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That's me! in the middle. My BFF (Robyn Megan Clare) on the left. |
Sam loves that I'm doing a "dear diary thing here" - I guess I'm just typing out what the voices in my head tell me to. (Senzo is sitting on my right, making weird sounds... Contemplating his sanity... wait... I'm being hypocritical again. - I need to work on that)
Well, we have been working on a three stone collet, made out of silver wire with a gold shank. I've been struggling with the wire setting, the trick is to be patient, and to work without haste. Accuracy and a steady hand wont hurt either, but I'm still just a rookie. I will become more accurate with time. The steady hand well... hockey is not helping me with that at the moment. Three weeks ago I sprained it badly and I have an odd lump of calcification on my right index finger.
I have pulled out of all hockey matches from now on, however I still attend practices. I do love to play hockey, but I cant let a sports injury affect my future career, and hand injuries are common on the hockey field.
I am getting increasingly stressed, about my semester marks, getting a driver's license, being able to afford food and rent. I feel inadequate, I feel that i have reach my peak. That I will never again be the best in the country, that I will never realize my dream of becoming a household name. I am terrified. So, so terrified. Of meritocracy.